A funny the happened on the way to America…

Last Friday night, August 23, 2002, I was reading, with rapt interest, the posts being made in an online discussion forum by an American man with a Filipina sweetheart going through the visa process in Manila, Philippines.  He wrote regarding his beloved Justina, and an unexpected twist in plans that had her leaving the St. Luke’s Medical Extension Clinic with all her visa application paperwork still in hand, being told to return to the Embassy on September 6^th for a walk-in interview.  Now this is an all new process which none of us were expecting to start until September 1^st.  My own sweetheart, Jennifer, was scheduled to leave for Manila on Monday, August 26^th, and we had already planned out her daily schedule for the entire week.  Now it seemed my best laid plans might run into trouble with the early startup of the renewed interview process.  Oh well, what’s a guy to do?  I called Jennifer and gave her a heads up about the possible change in procedures and assured her it was not going to be a problem if she was also told to return at a later date.

So Monday came and Jennifer and her mom headed for Manila.  Their plane arrived shortly before noon and they got to the hotel just about 12:00.  Following the guideline schedule I had given her, she went to the offices of the CFO (Commission on Filipinos Overseas) and asked if she could have a reservation number for one of the seminars on Tuesday.  She told me the people there were so friendly that they really put her at ease.  They told her that if she had brought her postal ID and passport she could have taken the seminar that day.  But Jen had not brought either, so they just told her to be there early on Tuesday and she would have no problem getting into the 10:00 class.  She left there and went on to St. Luke’s Medical Extension Clinic to ask where they send the girls to have their pictures made for the processing there.  Then she walked across the street to the studio they pointed out and had the needed pictures taken, and she and her mom called it a day.  So far everything seemed to be going right according to schedule.

Then Tuesday morning came.  Jennifer and her mom arrived back at the CFO office before 8:00 to wait for the 10:00 seminar.  They had her fill out her paperwork and then began asking her questions.  And then they began to really interview her, asking questions about me, questioning her decision to marry an Kano at such a young age, warning her of all the dangers of marrying a foreigner whom she could not possibly be certain she really knew, and assuring her that the fact I have been twice divorced, albeit many years ago, indicated that I could not possibly be a desirable partner.  They allowed her to attend the 10:00 seminar, but then continued the one on one, and sometimes several on one, interviewing process they had begun earlier.  She ended up not leaving the CFO until around 3:30 in the afternoon, having been there over seven hours… for a two hour seminar.  And then they told her to go to her hotel and think it over for the night, and return with her mother for another round of interviews, of both of them, on Tuesday morning at 8:00.

Needless to say, Jennifer was just about wiped out after a day like that.  She returned to her hotel and cried until almost 6:00 Tuesday evening when I called her.  She told me about most of what had happened in the course of her day and I almost couldn’t believe what I was hearing.  I have been reading the experiences of many, many other Filipino-American couples (in the Asawa forum on the internet) since last November and I have never heard of anything like this in all that time.

I called Jennifer back when I got home from work tonight (Tuesday) at 6:00.  It’s already 6:00 Wednesday morning for her, so she and her mom are preparing for their second day with the CFO.  Now she began to tell me a little more about what really happened on Tuesday.  As it turns out, while they were questioning her about why she wanted to marry this Kano who is so much older than her, she mentioned the fact that I, in my internet profile, had headlined my page with a stated desire to have a Proverbs 31 wife.  This is a statement which almost every bible believer understands to mean, quite simply, “a virtuous woman.”  The group of people who had gathered to question her actually laughed in her face at such a remark.  Then they said I must be a bad man if I would not have been interested in her if she had not been a like minded believer.  Her response was that if I had not clearly been a God fearing man, she would have had no interest in marrying me either.   That brought only more laughter and derision.

Somewhere in the process they even managed to show Jen all of the horror flick videos which I have been told are usually only used in the Cebu City CFO.  She got to hear testimonies from several Filipina who have married Kanos only to be beaten, abused, isolated, prostituted or turned into nothing more than lowly servants by the men they had “loved”.  And then she was told that it’s very possible I might also be just like one of those guys the other poor Filipina had been deceived by.

Wow, all of this excitement and only one day behind schedule so far!  Jennifer and her mom are both ready to return to the CFO this morning, and I pity the person or persons who scorn their beliefs today.  They would do well to understand that Jennifer’s mom is not called Pastora Provido without reason; and they might well be due for their own season of instruction today.  I have heard the woman testify!

Well, when we finally get beyond this little portion of our journey, I will certainly be happy to give you all an update on what’s going on over there.